Sunday, February 19, 2006

The Classroom


I don't believe in home schooling not because of the education level but because once you familiarize yourself with the players you'll notice that they're everywhere-


Ex. AIRPLANES



The Principle:
You always here his voice loud and clear but rarely see him. He* tells his audience what is to be expected during the course. All major problems are dealt by him- (Flight Plan anyone?)
*I'm fully aware that there are female pilots so sharap.

The Cry Baby:
Basically the annoying kid who cries for no reason or for feeling neglected. Equally ignored and hated by everyone.
*The cry baby is always seated next to me. ALWAYS FRIGGIN ALWAYS! I think there should be planes that carry any kids under 6 or better yet a baby section with sound proof walls!

The Heckler:

Always with his nasty (sometimes witty) loud remakrs on just about everythin. This dude is going through an identity crisis and it just so happens that seeking attention and laughs is his number one priority for the day.
*Once a local celebrity (if that's what we call them) was sitting next to me and the heckler wouldn't let him be he kept screaming out "Haa khaaaly imsha'3il Bluetooth??!" "Haa yubaaay sayartik lilbai3?)

The Bully:
The ever so annoying piece of shit sitting behind you pulling on your hair or rocking your chair during take off and landing for additional turbulence effects in hope you'd think it was due to the air bumps or the principle's short comings.
*I love makin the bully cry!

The Compulsive Eater (aka the fat kid):
During lunch time he eats everythin on his lunch plate, asks the canteen lady (stewardess) for additional snacks and then stares at your food in hope you'd give him some of your bread.
* I love feeding this fella!

Teacher's Pet:
Always there to impress with her excessive 'please' & 'thank yous' and ridiculous questions that are asked just to show she's* paying attention. "If I'm not mistaken we'll be landing in 25 minutes?"
* She's usually a she!

Stinky:
Yeah I have nothin to say about stinky. I hate you. Jeeez just take a friggin shower before coming on board! Every time I encounter stinky I remember my postponed project of walking around with hygiene kits to pass out to the likes of him.

The Apathetic Goth:
He's the one always dressed/make-uped in dark colors and when seated nods his head to the deranged heavy metal music and when standing (waiting in line to make bola for example) is the one who wins the popularity contest for all the passengers are staring and trying to figure him out with their very audible whispers.
* This is especially evident on Kuwait Airways- the "7ash ashkhara". Blukh!

The Rebel:
Who is fully aware of the rules but insists on testing the smoke detectors the Pilot praises about. So in he goes in the toilet - gets his fix and goes back to his seat. Minutes later you hear the Pilot complaining and trying very hard to show how disappointed he is. When the rebel does it again the Pilot informs the class that the police will be awaiting at the doors during Home-Time- yeah suuuuuurrrrre buddy.

The Nerd:
Always there sitting all fidgety with the first button of his shirt closed making anyone lookin at him uncomfortable beyond belief. Not only that he always has the latest high tech gadgets on his tray table which he doesn't use by the way. He simply sits there breathes on a piece of cloth and wipes everything. If you show interest in any of his gadgets he'll instantly hide them in his squeky clean briefcase.
* I'm always jealous of his gadgets.



*Please place your seats in the up right position!




7 comments:

teagirl said...

You wouldnt complain about the cry baby if you were the one that owned it. God after flying several times with my kid sister when ever I see other people with kids I feel SO sorry for them. God I hate flying with KIDS.

Jan6a said...

laialy: haven't we all!

photoflow: I'll be smart enough to sedate my kids during the whole flight. :p

d: Never give the kids anythin, they'll just keep on bugging u. Only make exceptions for the quiet excessively cute ones.

Aaggghh u know what i hate!! The Peek-a-boo game! First 10 minutes can be mistaken for bein 'cute' but on a 9 hour flight - IT GETS BORING! Does the 4 year old think so- nuh -uuuhhhhh ..

Nunu-San said...

Speaking of stinky!! EeeeWwww!!! Tell me about it, ishkethir zaydeen 3indna bil gym!!
Apparently cz el nas eb ejaza, inshallah ykhiffoon ma3a el wagt =/

Luckybellybuddha said...

Brrrilliant 3ayara. Wonderfully written :)
I find the attitude of "crap in this place now that you've paid for your trip" most intense in Kuwait Airways & specifically speaking, by Kuwaitis :-/
I remember last time flying, it took the kids of two families precisely 15 minutes to turn the entire left lane of the business class & its surrounding seats to a pigsty, no exaggeration :-(

Jan6a said...

nunu: wana help out in the pass out hygiene kits projects?

buddha buddy: Ee hamaJ i know! I prefer the get everythin u paid for attitude over the i own this joint attitude. 3araft'hum ? hehe im not gona be stereotypical and single out a minority bs they're funny they take everythin given to them and ask for extra sugar, biscuits, quilts just so they can stuff in their bags. hehe they amuse me and i usually give them whatver i have just to see if they'd take it - AND they do and they're grateful!

Luckybellybuddha said...

hehe.. how sweet:-).. & I think I know mino you mean :)

Nunu-San said...

Oh yes please!!